Several years ago, I went to the New David Cinema porn theater in New York. It was mostly known as a hangout for old men. Well I sat down to watch the movie, and pretty soon this decrepit old man in a rumpled coat came and sat down in my row, one seat away from me. He had on dark sun glasses and the collar of his coat was turned up hiding his face. He wasn’t much to look at, but I figured what the heck. So I moved over into the seat next to him. He sat there stiff as a board looking straight ahead. Well I figured it must be his first time there and he was a bit nervous. So I casually laid my hand on his thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze. Suddenly the man growled, “God dammit! I vant to be left alone!!”. I jerked my head around to look at the man, only to realize that I had just felt up Greta Garbo.